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I'm smug as hell and I don't care who knows it! |
Now let's clear the air waves a tidbit because it is evident to me (and most likely the two people reading this) that I do not have any direction for this piece. For all you and I know I could end it right here and that would be that--a strange, meandering essay that weakly insults two American soccer players from the 90s. Where are you going with this? That is an excellent question to ask, me. And frankly I have no idea. But can I be honest for a second? I mean really honest? I don't like John Harkes. There I said it. It kind of feels good to have that out in the open. Sometimes I will watch Thursday night soccer with the sound off. That is how much I dislike him. I won't even listen to the play-by-play, just in order to avoid the color commentary. I know. So John Harkes aside, I think the biggest problem with American soccer--and I am about to get really real here--is not being the best.
Some people may argue my point above that Asmugi Smalas is the face of American soccer. What about Landon Donovan? They'll say angrily. Or how about good ol' boy Clint Dempsey? They'll add unhelpfully. And I'll be like: first of all, I don't even know you, secondly, what have they done? Huh? Show me one thing they have done? Their team beat Spain in a friendly exhibition. Ok, that was pretty great. I was watching live and I was all like CLINT!!!!111!! But it was an exhibition. When it has come time to perform in world class competition the USA has been extremely disappointing. And as a full-blooded, dashingly handsome American it is a shock and a great embarrassment not to be the best at a sport. I mean have you seen the women's softball team? It was like they were playing against 4-year olds in the Olympics. Remember that one time the Basketball team got a bronze medal (3rd place) and everyone was like Never. Again. ? And the next year they showed up and trounced the world. That is what we are used to: trouncing other teams in almost everything. So when the US soccer team does not trounce they are easy to dismiss.
There. I think I almost made a point. Right? If I didn't, oh well I'm done. It just feels good to write again. Am I right? This guy knows what I am talking about.
Watch the MLS game of the week this Sunday night with Chivas USA taking on DC United at 10:00 Eastern Time only on ESPN2.
Bro yeah, Harkes can go suck it. He looks a little better shaved but overall I think he should go suck the it. Good point, we only like what we kick ass in. Like any 5 year old boy
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